Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Not Ready...

I wasn't going to write an entry about this, but I don't know how else to release everything I've been feeling since I've heard the news. I figured blogging has never let me down in the past so here I am. I apologize in advance that this has nothing to do with my business but it's still apart of me... and that's all the reason I need right now.

 *******

In the back of my mind, I always knew this time would come. And no matter how much I tried to prepare myself, I knew I would never be ready when it finally came around.

To be completely honest, I don't know what to do with myself. I try to go about my days as normally as I can as to keep my mind preoccupied the best I can. But once I'm alone with my thoughts, I feel nothing but immense sadness. Every inch of my heart aches because there's not one single thing I can do to change anything. The only option I have is to accept this inevitable reality and I .. just can't.

I'm not ready.
And I don't think I ever will be...




I love my Ah Gong too much

1 comment:

  1. Hihi Peachie Love! I'm an annonymous reader that checks your posts once in a while because they're so interesting :3 It's my first time leaving a comment! Anyways...

    I feel you

    "To be completely honest, I don't know what to do with myself. I try to go about my days as normally as I can as to keep my mind preoccupied the best I can. But once I'm alone with my thoughts, I feel nothing but immense sadness. Every inch of my heart aches because there's not one single thing I can do to change anything."

    Being sad is the only thing you can do right now And it's fine... because after all, you loved your grampa ._. Being sad means you truely loved him and that is one of the purest things there is out there. There isn't a lot of trust and honesty in this world... so in a way, I think it's a beautiful thing... I'm sorry for you loss, I felt the same when my grampa died too... its just too sudden right? But you know what? Your memories will keep him alive inside your heart
    I'm sure a lot of family and friends miss him too.. You guys can talk about it and share your thoughts, memories, stories, tears, together
    That helped me a lot

    I'll share 1 of mine with you

    When my grampa was in the hospital, he was sleeping and I just sat there with the rest of the family. Suddenly, he called my name.... turns out he was dreaming. And then, he told me to sweep the floor... (When I was young..around 3 years old, I accidentally spilled my bowl of rice so he gave me a broom and told me to sweep)

    At the time... I teared up, and I still do when I think about it because it was the exact same thing I heard him so so long ago.
    But then sometimes when we mention about that event, we'd laugh too..: 'Muhn Muhn, sow day!'


    I really hope you feel better in time
    As for now..
    Aja! Figh-ting! Q('-'Q)

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