Wednesday, November 21, 2012

* The BLAH Days *

For all the girls who:

Have weak moments of low self esteem and look in the mirror at like 7am in the morning with no makeup, hair undid and feeling gross... and think, geez. This is me. This is what I really look like.

Who's ever going to love this?

And in your mind, images of models, celebrities, and pretty girls you know start flashing in and out and the comparing begins. Why don't have I have her eyes? Her nose is perfection.

I bet she wakes up in the morning looking beautiful while I have to go through a whole routine to be decent for the day... blah blah blah.

Everything is blah. Your face is blah. Your body is blah. Your wardrobe is blah. You feel .. BLAHHH!!


Let me just say this. EVERY SINGLE woman goes through this. No matter how gorgeous, accomplished, confident and perfect she may be. Because in our own minds, we're never enough. We get so boxed into our worlds that we forget having the very simple and most basic things (like 2 hands, 2 feet, eyesight, hair no matter how frumpy it can be sometimes :p) is in itself... a blessing.

So what I do when I go though my BLAH moments is .. I let myself have a 15 min pity party. Like if I feel like crying, I'll cry. If I feel like ranting on my blog, I'll rant. The point is to get it ALL out of my system.

Then I take a deep breath and go through all the positive points unique to myself one by one. Some days it's a quick 1, 2, 3 and I'm good. Other times it definitely takes longer and with some in depth one on one sessions with close friends.

At the end of it all, I thank God for his continual and ever generous blessings because really, every day I'm alive.. talking/writing to you fantastical people is truly a blessing.

Ok ok I can picture Regina's face already.

I'll stop.

Love you guys lots lots lots

Thursday, November 8, 2012

* Catching My Breath *


There are times when you want to quit. When you want to throw up your hands and just walk away. You stumble. You fall. And you cant seem to catch a break.

Nothing seems to go your way.
No matter how hard you're running, you don't seem to be going anywhere.

I wont sit here and tell you things will get better because you already know that. You've heard it from everyone... including me somewhere in a past blog post.

But I will tell you that I've been there ... many many times before.
I've made mistakes. Some so bad that I honestly felt nothing but hopelessness. Because that's all I could see. What I did wrong. What I wasn't doing right.

How fast other people were getting to where they were meant to go. 

Where did I fit into the picture?

No where. 

And there was no way out.
It's like trying to find your way out of a pitch dark room with no direction whatsoever.

So what do you do?
You .. just.. walk. Day by day.
You surround yourself with good people. I mean really good people who will remind you of all the amazing things in life.

You'll go out, laugh, have great times and slowly forget your woes.

And finally. When you're ready.. you forgive yourself. Even if you believe whatever that happened wasn't your fault, you accept responsibility for your part. Because at the end of the day, it's your life. And in order to move on and make progress, you have to find peace within yourself.

It took me years to get to where I am now. And I recognize fully that I'm still a work in progress and will always be but .. I got out. Through all the mess, tears, frustrations and situations I put myself in, I reached the light at the end of the tunnel.

Without going through all that, I promise you with everything I have today I wouldnt be working at Wong Fu. So to answer the question I get asked the most: How did you get a job at WFP?

This is my answer.
It found me the same time I was looking for it. And I was only looking for it because I had reached the right frame of mind AFTER climbing my way out of the holes I dug myself into and UNDERSTOOD why I had to fall in them. 

It was a journey. I wouldnt trade it for anything in the world. Or else I wouldnt be who I am today.

This may not be my ultimate destination but it's quite the paradise <3

 gawww  ;]